Exit interviews are no longer a procedural formality. Human resource professionals are skilled at asking probing questions that are designed to elicit candid feedback from departing employees. You may be caught off-guard by this part of the process unless you anticipate and prepare—and there could be some negative repercussions if you do things incorrectly.
For instance, the HR rep may ask about your relationship with your manager or if anyone influenced your decision to leave. Alternately, they may attempt to conduct competitive research by asking about your new employer and how much you’ll be making. Naively sharing the details of your offer may get you off on the wrong foot with your new employer.
The bottom line is you don’t want to wing it when it comes to these types of conversations. Here are some tips for navigating exit interviews effectively after you've quit.
Consider Your Options
You’re not required to participate in an exit interview unless it's mandated in your employment agreement. However, under the right circumstances, an exit interview can provide the opportunity to share valuable feedback that can lead to improvements, noted Maggie Mistal, career and executive coach.
“A good ending can enable a good beginning,” she pointed out. Plus, if you leave on good terms, you may be eligible for rehire should you want to return. And you never know when you might need a reference for a job application from your former boss.
With all that in mind, what should you consider before saying “yes?”
Think about your comfort level with human resources and the role they play in the company before consenting to an exit interview, warned Catherine Mattice, founder and CEO of Civility Partners.
For instance, if you’re familiar with the representative who will be conducting the interview, and HR has a history of using feedback to make positive improvements, you may feel comfortable providing fairly candid feedback without fear of repercussions.
But if a visit with your company’s HR is akin to a trip to the principal's office, you should either decline to participate or be more guarded about what you say. Also, be aware that most companies will honor your request to speak with a specific member of the HR staff.
If you’re not at peace with the situation surrounding your resignation or have so much pent-up frustration that you’re afraid it will boil over during an exit interview, then you’re better off declining the interview and focusing on the future.
Get Your Head Straight
Being prepared for an exit interview helps you keep your emotions and answers in check.
Reflect back on why you joined the company and both your good and bad experiences so you can express opinions and feedback in a professional, objective manner.
Try to answer questions from a place of gratitude, Mistal said. You can’t control the situation, but you can control your tone.
Set some boundaries for yourself and have a clear idea of what you want to get across beforehand, so you don’t fall into a trap and say things you later regret. In fact, consider bringing notes to the interview, because focusing on facts and examples can help you present a clear and rational perspective instead of sounding like you’re complaining. In many respects, an exit interview is a lot like a job interview: thorough preparation significantly increases your chances of success.
Don’t be blindsided, Mattice said. Anticipate “gotcha” questions, which may put you in a bad light when answered fully and honestly. Instead, try to answer with introspection and insight.
See this as an opportunity to embrace an outsider’s perspective by shining light on problems that are being ignored or opportunities that are hiding in plain sight.
For instance, if HR asks about your boss’s support and willingness to advocate for your team, say something like: “As you might expect, we didn’t always see eye to eye. For instance, there were times when we disagreed about priorities and resources, leading to project delays. But I realize that he’s under pressure, too.”
It’s always good to be honest in a sincere way during the exit interview. One positive approach is to see the exit interview as an opportunity to help the teammates you're leaving behind with some honest and valuable feedback.
Try prefacing an answer with: “I am going to be honest with you so that hopefully you can use my feedback to fix the problem.”
Then continue with: “Both my teammates and I feel that we need added visibility into resource availability and capacity. In my view, investing in a robust workload management tool, analyzing tasks and redistributing work to teams with extra capacity may help to prevent burnout and turnover.”
Again, use your personal values and boundaries to guide you. For instance, if HR asks about what you’ll be making at your new company, simply state “they’re paying me market value.” If pressed, explain that you’re not comfortable sharing the details of your new offer.
“You don’t have to go there if the environment doesn’t feel safe,” Mistal advised. Keep in mind that you can always politely refuse to answer any question that makes you feel uncomfortable.
As long as you maintain emotional control during the exit interview, you’re in the driver’s seat.
